Fandom: German National team
Disclaimer: I still don't know people mentioned in this story and I still hope it isn't true. The plot is still only my fantasy
Summary: Autumn. Joachim's POV
Author's notes, previous chapters and music here
Timeline for the series is here
‘Hush’, I whisper, and the child is asleep already in my arms. Peaceful and undisturbed, so innocent and blissfully ignorant about the troubles that plague all the adults, snuggling to me as if I am her favorite teddy bear.
The leaves are already beginning to turn from green to soft shades of gold, and the evening is still warm, but the scents, these special scents of autumn betray the time of year, even if summer still doesn’t want to move away.
The girl sleeping in my arms calls me ‘Uncly Jogi’, though I can’t even say what kind of relative I am to her. Not that it matters, not that it will ever matter – I’ll always be the uncle to her, and for me she’ll always be simply Laura.
Some things never change.
This will be one of the few regrets in my life – always, when I’m holding another child close to me or when my godson is playing with my iPod that I still can’t figure out. One of the few things I will never have…
But still I have everything. Almost everything. Be grateful for every little thing you’ve got, for every new day and the world around you that you are blessed to witness – that’s what my parents taught me ever since I was a child, and I do, I always do.
As the sun goes to dawn, everything around is calm and peaceful, and I can feel this calmness inside too – almost surprisingly. This winter was cold, and spring brought no peace but only new worries, and after the hectic rush of summer autumn suddenly brings everything to its place. A miracle of Autumn, and as the autumn air is cold and clear, the blood becomes calm too.
For the second year in a row autumn comes, and suddenly everything in the world is right. Though really nothing has changed, but at the same time…
Maybe it is something inside of me.
The autumn came, and suddenly I’m not so easily irritated anymore. This constant overreacting that worried me and angered everyone around… Where has it all gone? Olli’s silly jokes are just that – silli jokes and nothing more, Hansi’s constant prodding is just cute, Andy’s know-it-all demeanor is perfectly justified, football is just a game, and even the silver locket that hangs around Daniela’s neck is only a trinket and nothing more.
And Jürgen laughed at me. I cursed myself because of my carelessness, and he promised that he’ll do better with the next Christmas gift. And when I hear him laugh like that and when he talks to me in this tone of voice I can only wonder how I ever could start doubting that I am loved.
And though this autumn is nothing like a previous one, it’s still the same. We talk, we only talk, we didn’t even celebrate our anniversary, he was in clinic then and I was too busy drawing lines around tactical schemes to notice everything around, but still everything is like it was then. Everything is well.
Maybe it’s just because it’s autumn.
‘Hush’, I whisper, more to myself then to quiet a child, she is already sleeping anyway. None of us needs this word to feel peace inside, we both already do.
Maybe because it’s autumn…